Archive for the ‘spiritual’ Category


NMAT Part 3

December 10, 2007

NMAT’s over.
And no, I won’t be writing any more emo posts. I would also not post any questions from the exam per contract between the Center for Education Management and the examinee (Ahem). They, however, have nothing against saying what the test was like.
IMO, Part I should have been scheduled to be finished under a longer time limit. Every examinee I talked with fully agreed with me on this one. It was the first time in my entire life that I did not finish a section of a time limited exam. I had to randomly guess the answers of several numbers since there was no longer any time to read them all.
Part II was a breeze. Biology was easy. Social Science was easy. Physics and Chemistry were easy. If it was permitted to return to Part I, I would have had time to more confidently answer them. Plus I would still have a few minutes to catch up on my sleep debt from last night.
I do hope I can still get the coveted 99+ percentile*, but those sections that I missed would certainly affect the result. But whatever my result will be, I will still surrender it to God. I did my best. I leave the rest to Him.

*No harm in hoping. Besides, having high standards is a good motivator for excellence.



December 6, 2007

I’m having exam jitters.
The National Medical Admission Test (NMAT) will be held this Sunday. I can’t say I’m not prepared. I have high hopes that I’ll be above average, but I’m not sure if I get to belong to the coveted highest percentile.
It’s not that I want to prove myself. I don’t need to do that. People should take me and other people as what we are, not basing their opinions on our reputations. I just feel as if every event of my entire existence was building up towards my climactic taking of this exam.
Ordinarily, I don’t feel the jitters until 5 minutes before a major event starts. Heck. I used to not feel the jitters every time I take exams. This time it’s different. It’s fully 3 days before the DAY, and I’m starting to feel anxious.
Thank God He will not leave me in this situation. As I post this blog I remember Philippians 4:6-7.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

God of the Past, the Future, and the Present. I commit my life into Your hands. Do with it according to Your will in the name of the Alpha and Omega, the Beginning and the End, the Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.



August 7, 2007

I’ve always wondered why God did not see fit to give us complete control over our body functions. While we can think, move, and act voluntarily; we do not have a say on the regulation of thyroxine hormones, production of Adenosine Triphosphate, and management of beta-oxidation among other things.

In fact, even breathing is not fully voluntary! Try committing suicide by holding your breath, and if by sheer force of will you pass the point of unconsciousness, your medulla oblongata, denied the power to override your will, takes over your breathing control with a vengeance and you end up breathing normally.

And it is this act of breathing that made me spend minutes in a few days thinking about breathing, and I discovered something trivially profound (or profoundly trivial) from those sessions. It is impossible to be conscious of involuntary breathing. The moment you become aware of breathing is the moment breathing becomes voluntary.

Now this fact made me wonder what made the experts conclude that breathing can be an involuntary act considering that they could have never observed involuntary breathing in themselves. Now I don’t know how they actually did it. I’m thinking it has to do with sleep.

“Since we are unconscious while we sleep” the expert continued, “but we still breathe during that time, then we must be capable of involuntary breathing. “

Or it could have went like this, “What makes us breathe when we don’t think about breathing,” said one expert to another as the topic made them both gain control of their breathing.

“I don’t know,” said the other expert. “Perhaps some part of our brain does it for us whenever we’re too lazy to notice.”

“Ahh,” said the first expert as both he and the other expert tried desperately to discover the point where they could notice involuntary mechanisms to take control of their breathing.

Perhaps it took a few decades, several centuries, or many a millenia; but technology finally gave us the answer. Electric brain analysis tells us that the medulla oblongata and the pons, both component parts of the brain, regulate involuntary breathing.

Now this got me thinking. Perhaps one reason why God didn’t give us complete control over all our body functions, besides the fact that this would point us to seek a Sovereign God who controls everything, is so that we wouldn’t be boggled by too many decisions. Considering that we can be boggled by breathing, what more if we had control over other functions.

“I have to increase my pulse to 130 beats per minute; my brain is not getting enough ketone bodies.”

“I must not pee, better produce Anti-Diuretic Hormone, but I could suffer from urine back flow. I’d better reabsorb this excess water with <insert hormone name> hormone.”



July 24, 2007

Months after I read the Principia Discordia, I was faced with the choice of eating a hot dog bun or go hungry. It would have been awkward to decline the free offer, considering that nobody there, to my knowledge, has even heard of Discordianism. Explaining that philosophy in a Bible study (of all places) is highly improper. The Bible holds Order in prime importance* while Discordianism holds Disorder as coequal and coeternal with Order.
I’ve never been a full supporter of Discordianism, but I was sympathetic to it. The Principia, its “holy” book (which is ironic since it is a demystifying philosophy), introduced me to Discordianism. It had a pseudo-religious tone with a scathing sarcastic humor that appealed to my intellectually parched mind. Nevertheless, I could not abandon the Christian faith. Discordianism pales in the light of the reality of Christ in whom Perfect Order is manifested**.
Yet, as I said earlier, I was sympathetic to Discordianism. I stopped eating hot dog buns as I recalled the story of the Original Snub. I had a Discordian celebration of Earth Day (I did not do much. My pineal gland won’t let me litter). I even drew the Sacred Chao everywhere (Everyone, however, thought it was the Yin-Yang. I did not disillusion them; they won’t understand my explanation anyway.).
I was convicted to renounce Discordianism altogether, which I partially did. I deleted my copy of the Principia, and stopped relating anything to the number Five. Yet despite those changes, I still refused to eat hot dog buns.
This may seem trivial, but the point is not about diet. It’s about acknowledging the truth of the Bible as opposed to all other thoughts and ideas, Discordianism included. Keeping that one tenant of Discordianism was tantamount to swearing off the Bible, considering that God is Jealous, and He would not give his glory to another.
Ironically, the lesson tonight included Manasseh. It should be remembered that Manasseh drastically altered the Divine Order of the Temple by introducing different designs and even heathen altars into its complex. The Lord considered this an evil thing. Even today, the Lord still considers anything that competes with His Order as evil. His words are not to be tampered with. He promises grave punishment to those who add or remove from them.
And so as I ate the hot dog bun, I renounced whatever vestige of Discordianism I still clung to. I know it’s incompatible with the truth of the Bible no matter how much I try to justify it. Although I must admit that it is a fun philosophy, it is not truth. It is a lie and should be abandoned. Nothing should compete with God given Order.

*According to the Bible: Church services should be ordered. The law itself is ordered. Corresponding punishment is meted out for the corresponding crime.
**Order does not mean uniformity. Remember the analogy of the church to the human body? One body, many parts. One church, many roles.