Archive for the ‘satire’ Category

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Darkening Cream

October 27, 2007

In an unbelievable event that would shock ordinary Filipinos, scientists have discovered a way to turn light skinned people dark.
Scientists recognize that fair skinned people have a damaged metabolic pathway that prevents them from producing melanin, the pigment that protects us from the sun. A study led by Dr. David E. Fisher, director of the Melanoma Program at the Dana-Farber Cancer Institute in Boston, tested a small molecule on red-eyed and fair skinned mice. It turned out that it restored the damaged pathway. Nevertheless, it would be a while before this would be used on humans. Good news for those Caucasians who want a tan. Bad news to those Filipinos who want to be fair.
Rumor has it that Filipino scientists are doing a parallel research. Instead of trying to repair the pathway that makes people dark, they are looking for ways to destroy that pathway. It wouldn’t be long before whitening would be as easy as lathering real whitening lotion on the skin. Now who wouldn’t feel happy throwing away those lying whitening soaps, lotions, and creams?